I often wonder why I keep referring back to the war, I wonder because I know I am a very optimistic person and I don't dwell on the past, I don't believe in thinking negative but my past in Baghdad is something I cant let go of, even though it hurts me to remember. We as humans, always want what we don't have, what we miss in our lives. I keep going back to the war days because it was the end of my life in Baghdad, everything I had back then, is very much missed in my current life. I miss having a house with a garden and a swing. I miss having family meetings, it kills me that our family, as strong as it was, is now separated.
There were great people in the family, ones who cherished education and knowledge, ones who knew so much about life as the number of years they had lived, such as my grandfather Dr.Najeeb (May his soul rest in peace) I was too young at that time to understand the value of those people, we all need teachers in our lives and it saddens me that I lost the chance to spend time with those precious people. The value of homeland is much more than having a residence paper and a permanent place to stay, home is about being raised on certain values and having the chance to grow up while experiencing them and then have another chance to make them better. Home is about being the same, celebrating on the same day, having a holiday on the same day, meeting in the same places. There is nothing that can offer you peace in all its kinds, as home can do. And if my writings can not bring back my own home, then I hope that at least, it can make you see the value of yours.
Away from politics, wars and international problems, we still have a life to face. I have been struggling to decide what shall I do for my future after graduation (since its happening in August) and I am still confused on whether I should finish master's degree or get a job for like two years and then go do master's. My profession as an architect is very critical when it comes to experience because it is preferred over master's and PhD's but yet again, I am also thinking of pursuing another profession which I deeply love, that is writing and journalism, I even thought I would combine the two professions and maybe something nice would come out but the thing is, I am really not sure if it will be successful money wise because I still need to make a living and I like being independent. So what do you guys think, should I pursue a career that can provide money or one that I deeply love??