Baghdad Girl

Blogging Since 2004

Friday, April 13, 2018

I have to say; My first visit to Baghdad since 2006

The first thing I noticed when the plane landed on Iraqi soil was the huge Iraqi flag, hanging from the control tower all the way down to the bottom. I felt the pride of Iraqis, the feeling of belonging was so intense. I was so existed to hear people speaking Iraqi accent everywhere, I truly felt at home. Then the drive to my grandfather's house started- May god rest his soul in peace, the house where I grew up and had the most precious memories of my childhood. I was trying to look everywhere and absorb everything, I couldn't get enough of Baghdad. Then we reached that beloved home, I stepped through its big rusty white gate and I felt magic, the feeling of tingling in your chest and butterflies in your stomach. Memories rushed through my mind and I really didn't know what to look at and where to start. My parent's were busy talking to the taxi driver and I just wanted the world to stop so I can keep his moment forever. The house, although occupied by people using some of its rooms to protect it from being stolen, was just the same and the unoccupied rooms were just the way we left them 13 years ago. My room was full of snow white posters dated 1999 and beautiful dolls and pink girly stuff that belonged to the teenage me. We spent the following week organizing stuff and preparing the ground floor of the house to be rented while keeping our stuff tugged away in the first floor. I went through old books, radios and pictures and I was in pain trying to decide what to take with me back to Dubai because I cant take it all. I ended up taking vintage printed photos and things that have personal value- things that belonged to my parents and grandparents. The week was also full of gatherings and meetings with old friends and distant relatives. Then the magic was over and reality came crashing down.
Baghdad looks like a ghostly circus, the architecture of the once dazzling houses and mansions is terrible. Bizarre decorations with absolutely no consideration for the context and surrounding vintage buildings. It is very obvious that the Mayoralty Of Baghdad is not doing its job, or the designs are not going through it for approvals before construction. The streets are dirty, the infrastructure is destroyed, there is no greenery and no public services. And the traffic, if I thought I had seen crazy traffic in Dubai-Sharjah during the rush hours, I was in for a big surprise. I have always considered myself an excellent driver but truth be told, if you haven't driven in Iraq, you know nothing about driving. There are no traffic signs and cars enter the intersection from all sides- it's a mess. Most of the beautiful luxury places are burned such as the Officers Club (نادي الضباط). I won't even start talking about the urban context of Baghdad.
I wanted to see the royal palaces but I couldn't for obvious reasons- they don't belong to the people anymore. You can't drive by and see the gate as before. I did however visit the most popular shopping place in Baghdad (Al Mansoor) area, it was almost the same as I remember. I used to go shopping for Eid in these streets, as usual I have memories everywhere.
My grandfather had Baghdad in his mind till his very last day. He wanted to come back, he wanted to see his house, his precious vintage car, his belongings and his dear neighbors. This is one of the many cruel outcomes of war. Grandparents are supposed to retire in peace among sons, daughters and grandchildren. Watch the lives of their babies as they grow up and become doctors, engineers, architects and lawyers. Instead they sit outside their homes, watching helplessly as the war takes away their homes, their past, their children and eventually, their lives.
I realised in this visit that Baghdad as I remember it, is gone. The things I used to write about in my blog are mostly gone. I used to dream about coming back home, while now I wonder if I have a home!

Thursday, October 23, 2014

The last post & The Goodbye

I started this blog years ago, when my heart was pure and my pain was little. The blog was supposed to be the true voice of Iraqis to the outside world, it was supposed to tell the truth that was never revealed by the media, and I hope the blog has done all that, I hope you all understand now that the war was unfair and its consequences were inhuman.
Too much has happened over the years and I saw too many people get hurt, we now live in a world where a widow with children is forced to leave her home with nothing but some clothes and suffer and fight so that her children can continue their education. A world where terrorist kidnap a father and a son, get money from their family and give them false hope that the hostages will be coming back in an hour, only to find later that the son is dead and the father has been shot 4 times and is currently in a coma. A world where people are competing whose pain is greater. My feelings are no longer important compared to those who suffer more than I do, my writings don't give them justice and don't give me satisfaction no more.
ISIS is the latest and cruelest war on Iraq, they misuse the name of Islam and they will never understand Islam. They murder Muslims and Christians all the same, this is not politics anymore but it is the beginning of the end of humanity, whoever is responsible for it is definitely not human. This will be the last post I write to you, my friends. I give up, I can not make the difference that I wished to make and I only hope that my silence will do better than my words.

Remember me with love, I love you all.

Saturday, June 14, 2014

Civilians in Iraq are in possible danger

My head is spinning from reading CNN reports, they are saying that the US is thinking of giving air-force assistant to the Iraqi government but the decision will take time because they don't have a target to hit and they don't want to harm civilians, and Iran will interfere if the holy cities in Iraq were attacked. CNN also says Iran denied having forces in Iraq but people are saying it already has troops there.
No one knows if this is true or not but for sure things aren't looking good, I hope and pray to God that people will be protected from yet another war.

Sunday, June 08, 2014

Mosul is falling down

Once upon a time, the Iraqi bloggers used to bring out the hidden truth that is ignored by the media, but we cant "blog" from outside Iraq! its just not fair. Mosul is falling under the hands of the wrong people and the local occupants are being forced to flee their homes and belongings, escaping on foot, towards a safer area that might protect them and their families. Heart breaking videos and pictures of families going homeless, tears and hunger in the middle of a fallen civilization.

Sunday, December 22, 2013

Home is all about being the same

  I often wonder why I keep referring back to the war, I wonder because I know I am a very optimistic person and I don't dwell on the past, I don't believe in thinking negative but my past in Baghdad is something I cant let go of, even though it hurts me to remember. We as humans, always want what we don't have, what we miss in our lives. I keep going back to the war days because it was the end of my life in Baghdad, everything I had back then, is very much missed in my current life. I miss having a house with a garden and a swing. I miss having family meetings, it kills me that our family, as strong as it was, is now separated.
 There were great people in the family, ones who cherished education and knowledge, ones who knew so much about life as the number of years they had lived, such as my grandfather Dr.Najeeb (May his soul rest in peace) I was too young at that time to understand the value of those people, we all need teachers in our lives and it saddens me that I lost the chance to spend time with those precious people. The value of homeland is much more than having a residence paper and a permanent place to stay, home is about being raised on certain values and having the chance to grow up while experiencing them and then have another chance to make them better. Home is about being the same, celebrating on the same day, having a holiday on the same day, meeting in the same places. There is nothing that can offer you peace in all its kinds, as home can do. And if my writings can not bring back my own home, then I hope that at least, it can  make you see the value of yours.

Saturday, December 07, 2013

Life, as we share it

Away from politics, wars and international problems, we still have a life to face. I have been struggling to decide what shall I do for my future after graduation (since its happening in August) and I am still confused on whether I should finish master's degree or get a job for like two years and then go do master's. My profession as an architect is very critical when it comes to  experience because it is preferred over master's and PhD's but  yet again, I am also thinking of pursuing another profession which I deeply love, that is writing and journalism, I even thought I would combine the two professions and maybe something nice would come out but the thing is, I am really not sure if it will be successful money wise because I still need to make a living and I like being independent. So what do you guys think, should I pursue a career that can provide money or one that I deeply love??

Thursday, August 29, 2013

Whats left to bomb?

Every time things go awfully bad in Iraq, I say "its the end, cant get any worse" but it does.  We have been receiving news of extreme Baghdad bombing for the past two days. I read my friends' (who still live in Baghdad) comments on Facebook and I just cant believe what is happening.  Some monsters keep exploding coffee shops full of young Iraqi guys, Iraqi youth!
If only we could bring a huge plane and get all the innocent people left in Iraq on board and take them to safety, and let the monsters, whoever they are, destroy what's left of Iraq. If the monsters are gone, we can build Iraq somewhere else. If we cant save the land then lets at least save the people!
Iraqi land is precious ok! but the lives of the innocents are just priceless...

Sunday, August 25, 2013


Its so sad what the world has came to be! Almost all kinds of media are twisting things, hiding the truth or revealing only "what suits them" parts. Media is supposed to be an HONEST mean of delivering news to the people, right or wrong, good or bad, it should be delivered as it is.  Everyone got so used to linking the word Muslim with the word Terrorist, seriously! this is not fair nor it is true. Islam is a way of life that some people choose to live by and I swear Islam is all about peace, never have I came across a rule in Islam that ended with hurting someone. Even when Islam demands war, it is never allowed to take place unless the enemy has started it first, and even if it did take place, Islam demands that all enemies treated with mercy and no harm should ever come to a woman, child or an unarmed man.
I never understood war, I hate it so much, I guess its good that I am a girl and I never have to hurt a person. I don't support any kind of violent and that's why I believe that any person who claims to be a Muslim but do violent acts or war or any other horrible action, is no Muslim at all!
So please take a minute and think about it, you will see that religions don't really differ, as humans, we are all the same. No matter whats your religion or even if you don't have one, the same principle applies! we are still all the same.

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Tears In My Eyes As I Grieve...

Its there again..
Tears ... burning my eyes... the love and kindness in my heart mixing with hatred...
Iraq is dying and there is no hope...
The Iraqi blood was once pricless, now its just a color that paints the streets of my belvoed country...
I grieve for you iraq

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

One is finished, Four to go ....

Hey people,
I have missed you :D but I never forgot you, I hope I am not forgotten as well. I finished my first year of studying Architecture, the results aren't out yet but I am hoping that they will be very good. My life is still pretty much the same, I am still living in The UAE, still a stranger to the rest of the world.. but I am as said before, moving on. I am going to get my driving license soon and that will make another dream of mine come true. I think I have achieved all my childhood dreams, now I am going to put new ones, maybe a little more distant.
I went to visit Iraq a couple of months ago, I was shocked to see what my country has turned into, I didn't go to Baghdad cuz it was more difficult to reach but I visited Mosul and was so sad to see it like that. I even went to a place that was my favourite back then when I was a child, it is called The Oprawe Hotel and I almost cried, the memory of it is forever destroyed, it was such a beautiful place, green gardens, people going in and out.. while now it is just another big building with no life.

What can I do??


Thursday, August 06, 2009

A promise

Hello friends,

I once told you that I would never stop blogging, I didn't keep that promise and I am really sorry for that but I'll try to make it up to you and start blogging again. Let's turn that page and start another, a better one. This blog means a lot to me and you all mean a lot to me, I can't tell you how much, so I'll simply say '' Thank you''.

I'll tell you how I am living my life and how it is different for me that I am an Iraqi girl. I have been through horrible days but I got through it and I am going to look forward to a better future. These last three years changed me forever and I am grateful for that. I feel educated, my English is so much better and believe it or not, I read books!! I used to hate them and never saw myself reading one for fun but then I read a book and found out that books are magical things, I love them.
My first day at the university will be on 23-8-2009, I am afraid because its a new experience for me and I have no idea how it is going to be, please pray for me. I feel this post was a mess but its a start.

P.S. Please correct any mistake (spelling or grammar) you find and I'll be really grateful for that. I want to keep improving my English language and there is no better way than to learn from my mistakes :D


Friday, July 03, 2009

Looking forward to the future

Hey people,

I am so sorry for the absence but I have been trying to rebuild my life. I am doing OK and I have news for you. Firstly, I am not going back to Iraq this year, maybe the next, however, I am not sure.
Secondly, I got accepted in The Department of Architectural Engineering, thanks to the 95% I got in my final year at school.
My picture was published in the newspaper for being one of the top students in my school AND My graduating party was amazing, I don't think I have ever felt that proud.

Finally, I am going to Jordan on 9/7/2009 for two weeks to spend part of the summer there.

I love you all and THANKS for supporting me.


Thursday, March 05, 2009

Roses for you

Hello my dear friends,

I am happy to read your comments and even happier that you still check my blog even though I stopped blogging a long time ago.
I wanted to tell you that I have achieved many goals during these last three years and I shall keep doing that in sha allah. I wrote a small article in a book called '' Iraq Then & Now '' by karen Dabrowska & Geoff Hann. I read a lot of books that helped me to improve my English language, one of those books was ''The Secret'' which I liked a lot.
I have another important thing to say, I might go back to Iraq soon. I don't know if it will be safe and happy but I do know that I'll go back a different person and I will hold on to my hope and pray for the safety of my family. You probably want to know why we decided to go back to Iraq again, well to say the truth, things aren't working well here with my dad's job and with this late economic depression we decided that its time to go back. I know it is selfish of me to say that I liked living in the UAE but can you blame someone to feel happy of living in peace like a normal person?? anyway I just wanted to say hi and sorry for not letting you know how i was doing.

My wishes to you all.


Monday, September 15, 2008

Words From Raghda

Hello dear friends,

I am OK and still reading this blog. I am going to the university next year :) I just got my IELTS score yesterday and it was very good, I am so happy. And I am so sorry for stop blogging, maybe one day I'll be back again. This blog was and still the best thing I have ever done in my life. Don't forget me. I love you all.


Monday, August 27, 2007

My memories are fading away...

"I wish there is some thing I can do". This sentence I have been repeating a lot these days. Every time I ask about the situation in Iraq I become angry and sad because there is nothing I can do. I wish some one can tell me what can I do to save what is left in Iraq.
I have left my house, my room and my cats that I know nothing about any more. When we left we didn't take every thing in the house with us because it is impossible, that house and every thing in it is a treasure, It was built 35 years ago, and now It is going to be looted just because it is empty and there is no one to protect it.

Some members the guards are checking every house in Hay Al-Jamia, where my house is, these days. Do you know what will they do if they find an empty one?? They close the roads leading to it, bring a lorry and loot every thing in that house. That is what about to happen to my house and it's 35 years of memories.
If the people who suppose to protect the country, are the ones who are destroying it. What future does Iraq still have???

Friday, August 24, 2007

Cute Kittens


I got this picture from this site, there are many nice pictures in there, I'll try to put the best cats here.

School is on the way, I can't believe I am saying this but I actually missed it.I still have two years before collage so wish me luck.


Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Happy Birthday To Me

Tuesday, July 31, 2007

I am proud


I just got back from Syria three days ago.I spent the most wonderful week among my relatives and family, I felt that I am in Iraq.I saw many nice places and had so much fun with Najma and HNK.I cried a little when I said good bye but I am fine now, at least I had the chance to see them.
I watched all the Iraqi football games and felt so proud when we won Asia Cup.I saw the Iraqis celebrate in Syria and Dubai, I never thought that I'll see them happy again.The Iraqi football brought us back to life.I want to say congratulations to our champions, and I wish you, our brave Iraqi football team, the best luck.

Raghda Zaid

Monday, July 16, 2007

Happy and sad


I am going to Syria the day after tomorrow to see my family, I might stay there for a week or two. I am happy and sad, happy because I am going to see people that I haven't seen for a year, and sad because I feel like I don't have a home any more.Iraqis can't go any where, it is like they don't want us in this world any more...

Friday, July 06, 2007

I just want to carry them...

Wednesday, July 04, 2007


Tuesday, June 26, 2007

I am Back

Hi my dear friends,

It has been along time since I wrote any thing in this blog, I apologize for that, these last few months were too hard for me.My grandfather's death, (may his soul rest in peace), school and final exams.I thought many times in saying good bye and close this blog but I couldn't, I love this blog and I love u.
I did great in my exams by the way, I got 98,3%.It was hard to study in these circumstances but thank God I was able to do it.
What else can I say, hmmm, Iraq...
There is no Iraq any more, it is gone just like my life there is gone, but who knows may be it will back again one day, I look forward to that.

I am tired of getting sad, so let us stop here.

New cats coming on the way. See you then my friends.

Prayers for my dear grandpa. I hope he’ll be ok wherever he is.


Wednesday, March 28, 2007



I apologize for not posting anything, I had many exams these last few weeks and I still have more, I wanted to post many times but I didn't have the time.



Thursday, March 01, 2007

Cat of the week

Hey I got this picture from Cat it seems that it was cat of the week...

I am doing great at school, thank you all for your nice commets that made me really happy.



Friday, February 23, 2007

What do you think they are doing??

Thursday, February 15, 2007

Happy Kittens

Sunday, February 04, 2007

I am back to school

I went to school today, after a two weeks holiday, I hate school because I have to wake up early at 6:00 am, how sad...

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

No comment

Sunday, January 21, 2007


I think they are going to jump at some thing, I wonder what it is??

Friday, January 19, 2007

I love those cute white kittens

Saturday, December 30, 2006

What an Eid!!

Today is the first day of Eid, the day which used to be the happiest to me for years till the war started and there were almost no Eids any more, but this Eid was the saddest, I waked up at 9 am and was shocked when I knew that Saddam Hussein has been executed at 6 am on the first day of Eid, what is this? Couldn’t they wait for a few days till the Eid ends, I know that Saddam has done some questionable things but he was the president of Iraq for 35 years, the man who could make life in Iraq possible and he shouldn't be treated like this.

I left Iraq to keep my self form getting hurt but it seems that it is not working because I am still hurting deep in side...

Sorry for the sad post but I had to say some thing about Saddam's execution, but even so I wont forget to say HAPPY EID.


Happy Eid

Sunday, December 24, 2006

Merry Christmas

Friday, December 15, 2006

Seven Angles

Friday, December 08, 2006

Good night dear kittens

Friday, December 01, 2006

The colored picture

A friend has sent this picture to me and I liked it very much, I hope you do too.

PS: There is rain today in the UAE, I am happy because it reminds me of Baghdad.

Best wishes


Thursday, November 16, 2006


Friday, November 03, 2006

Aren't they cute, or what??

Monday, October 23, 2006

Eid Mubarak

Saturday, October 21, 2006

Kittens having fun